Rape Culture: It’s Time For a Change

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Over the past couple years there has been a lot of media attention on sexual assaults on college Campuses. Stories from schools across the nation have made headlines. Documentaries like “the Hunting Ground” have shocked audiences across the country and schools are taking steps to change. Yet this problem is so much bigger than people realize because the media only tells part of the story. It isn’t just Columbia and Stanford. It’s not just young women on college campuses, sexual assault and violence against women happens everywhere, all the time, to girls and women of all ages.

Statistics say 1 in 6 women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime. This fact hangs over the heads of women everywhere. It’s the little voice in our heads that makes us travel in packs. It reminds us to never walk alone. It’s the instinct to change directions when we notice a man walking behind us. It’s something all women have to live with.

Every day we walk down city streets with our heads down as men hollar, whistle and stare. In school we have to make sure we wear clothes that aren’t distracting to boys. No shorts too short, no stomach or bra straps showing. When we go out we make sure to turn guys down as politely as possible. We make up excuse and tell lies, we say we have a boyfriend because saying no is never enough.We teach young girls how to dress, how to act and what to say. We teach them all these things in hopes that they do not become that 1. The pressure is put on women to protect themselves from rape. But, maybe instead of teaching girls to not get raped, we could instead teach boys how not to rape.

We have the power to raise this next generation differently. Instead of telling girls to cover up, we should teach boys not to stare. We need to teach boys not to catcall, instead of teaching our girls how to avoid them. We need boys to learn that a girl can wear whatever she wants whenever she wants. We need to teach boys that no means no and there is no excuse for violating another person.We need to demand more from boys. We need to teach the next generation of boys to respect girls so they grown into men who respect women.

I am not having kids anytime soon. But one day down the line if I do I will make sure to raise them differently. Things do not have to stay the way they are, our generation has the power to change things. We can make sure the next generation of boys learn to respect girls. We can make sure the ones who don’t are held accountable for their actions. We can make sure the system is set up to protect the victim, not the culprit. If we can do all that then future generations of girls won’t have to live in fear.

Originally published on Her Track

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My New Store

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This past semester I took a design class and invested in Photoshop, and I decided to put my new knowledge and software to good use. Over the past few weeks I have been designing graphics and I decided to post them all online, so I am now officially a seller on Redbubble!

If you don’t know what Redbubble is you should definitely go check it out it is one of my favorite online stores. Basically you can get anything you want on there, stickers, bags, notebooks, phone cases, T-shirt, canvases, posters. Individual artists upload their work and then can have it put on any product. Which means if you see a sticker you like you can also get that design on a T-shirt or notebook. There are tons of different designs you can get anything from your favorite song lyrics on a mug to a beautiful nature photo already framed and ready to hang up. There is really something for everyone on this site.

Here are a few products from my store.

In case you didn’t know, I am obsessed with quotes so that what most of my products will be, but I also have a few nature photos if you’re interested in that. I am in the middle of designing more quote graphics and the rest of those should be up soon. I am really excited about this please let me know what you guys think in the comments.

P.S. Please like and share it would be greatly appreciated! 🙂

23 Career Tips For Ever Girl With A Dream

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Over the past 6 months I have attended 6 conferences. I have listened to Ted Talk style presentations sat through traditional lectures. I have participated in interactive workshops and watched professional panels. I have collected about 100 business cards and a notebook full of advice. Now I have taken everything I’ve learned from these events and picked the top pieces of advice that every girl needs to know. Whether you’re looking for an internship or your first real world job, here are a few things you should keep in mind. 

1. Do your research. Have questions prepared before you go to an interview.
2. Interning is like dating for your career. Do it as much as you can if you want to find out what you really want in out of your profession.
3. Arrive with a goal. Bring it with you whenever you meet someone or go somewhere.
4. Seek out mentors. Choose ones that represent the very best of what you hope to become.
5. Find someone whose judgment you trust. Learn from them. Ask questions. Take advantage of those connections.
6. Manage your professional image like a celebrity would. You are your relationships and your reputation.
7. When you are starting out, no job is too small. Every job is another opportunity to grow and build your skills.
8. If you’re asked to do something, say yes. And if you don’t actually know how to do it, research it and ask for help. Don’t give up too easily.
9. A setback is a setup for a comeback. Learn from your mistakes, and pick yourself up from the ashes better than you were before.
10. Stand out. Be memorable.
11. Don’t worry about failure. Worry about what happens when you don’t try.
12. Be considerate. Makes it a point to say hello and goodbye to everyone you work with every day.
13. Make yourself essential. Make yourself an irreplaceable asset and keep getting better.
14. Be confident, but realistic. Don’t be delusional, and ensure that you maintain a certain amount of humility.
15. Be accountable. If you make a mistake, own up to it.
16. Websites are like an online business card. Build your resume in a plethora of formats.
17. Don’t be afraid to move on. Do what is best for your career, even if it means cutting ties.
18. You don’t have to be the best, but you should always try and be the best. Diligence and hard work are everything in the working world.
19. Remove the word “should” from your vocabulary. Be assertive and clear.
20. Push yourself. Improve while also understanding your own limitations.
21. Don’t neglect your responsibility to take care of yourself. You cannot do your job if you are not at your best both physically and mentally.
22. Don’t look at your peers as competition. Work with each other to grow and collaborate.
23. Stop comparing yourself to other people because No one’s journey is your own.

You may not have your dream job quite yet, but this advice is sure to help you get there.  If you have any more career advice be sure to leave it in the comments below.

Originally published on Her Track

6 Things Single Girls Want For Valentines Day

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It’s that time of year again, the temperature is dropping, the snow is falling and store displays look like Cupid threw up. Valentine’s day is a wonderful time of year where people in relationships are encouraged to express and showcase their love. While the single people are constantly reminded that they are in fact single. This time of year can get rough if you don’t have an adorable SO to cuddle up with, but I think all of us single ladies can agree, just because we are alone does not mean that we are lonely. The fact of the matter is not all girls even WANT a boyfriend. In fact, there are actually a lot of things we girls want more. What are these things we could possibly want more than our Prince Charming you ask? Well here you go, a glance into the single girl’s mind. Here is a countdown of the top 6 things girls want more than a boyfriend.

6. Self Love
Every person at some point in their life has had trouble loving themselves. There is so much focus on attaining love from someone else that we forget how many of us are striving to love ourselves first. We wish more than anything to have more confidence, to believe in ourselves and to love ourselves. The truth is many single girls would rather work towards building their own self-confidence than wait for a knight in shining armor to do it for them.

5. Netflix
Well come on, this is pretty self-explanatory; I mean there is always something to watch, no matter what mood you’re in. You want a romantic comedy? Maybe a reality show? An action movie? An informative documentary? It’s got all that and more. Netflix is like every girl’s boyfriend. He’s always there when you need him. He doesn’t care if you’re wearing sweats and no make-up, and he actually prefers to stay in with you and cuddle on the couch with a big bowl of popcorn.

4. Money
Being a girl is incredibly expensive, clothes, shoes, bras, razors, waxing, nails, make-up, tampons; it adds up. So do you know what I want even more than for a boy to express his undying love for me? A million dollars. Actually, make it 5. The new spring clothing lines will be coming out soon…

3. A Kick Ass Career
We all have career goals, and many of us are in school because an education will help us reach our goals. But personally I would like some assurance that I am not working my butt off for nothing. All the time that can be wasted on boys could instead be used to plan for the future. Use your extra time to hunt for internships or to search for jobs in your field. The truth is, no matter how cute he may be, a boyfriend can never make all of your professional dreams come true. Only you can do that.

2. Travel
Rome, London, Australia, Iceland; these are just some of the places I will be traveling to someday. There is not a girl on the planet who doesn’t want to travel. You want to travel now while you’re young, before you settle down and start having kids. Besides, if you don’t have a boyfriend when you go abroad you can have a fling with a foreign boy who likes to whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

1.Food
Just food. All the food. Chinese food, pizza, mac & cheese, Chipotle, Panera. Basically anything with a high sugar and fat content will suffice. I can tell you right now, food is a constant thought on every girl’s mind. It is every girl’s greatest companion. Chocolate is always there. Cake will never judge. Most girls would agree, ultimately they love food more than they love boys. Because the truth is no boy can satisfy you the way Panera Mac & Cheese can.

Happy Valentine’s Day girls.

The Real Heartbreak Of Losing a Best Friend

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When you and your SO break up you know exactly what to do. You change into sweats, put on some Adele, break out the chocolate or ice cream (or both) and have yourself a good cry. After you have accepted what’s happened you call up your besties who immediately come to your aid. They come over with piles of junk food and pizza, and start a violent rant session where phrases like “____ is such a jerk” and “you are better off” are said repeatedly.

You know exactly what to do after a breakup. There’s an entire manual on how to navigate this new single lifestyle you’ve entered. There are a million, movies, books and songs explaining exactly what you are going through. But then there is another type of heartbreak, one that people don’t talk about. It seems with all the talk about love and heartbreak we neglect to talk about what happens when you lose a friend. Friend breakups are completely different and a lot harder to manage. It’s not like you go see them and give some speech about how it’s been fun but you just don’t think it’s going to work anymore. When it comes to friendships there’s not always a solid conclusion, sometimes you don’t even realize it’s ended until after it’s over.

I remember exactly what happened when my best friend and I broke up. It was the first real heartbreak I had ever experienced and I remember every second of it like it was yesterday. I can still feel all of it; the anger, the hurt and the feeling of abandonment. I sat on the floor crying after the biggest fight my best friend and I had ever had. I was so mad. I figured we both needed a couple days to cool off, then we’d talk it out. But days turned to weeks which turned into months, and after so much time of radio silence I knew it was over.

I however was lucky, yes I had lost my best friend but I had recently made a couple new friends. This new group of ladies helped me through the whole ordeal and soon became my best friends. But not everyone is that lucky, most girls have to navigate through the rubble of a broken friendship alone. The truth of the matter is ending a friendship is ten times harder than ending a relationship. Your friends, your true friends have seen you at your lowest and most vulnerable points, but they’ve also been there for all the greatest highlights. Sometimes it seems as if your lives are completely intertwined. They have sat with you and pigged out during sleepovers. They’ve assisted you through every fashion crisis and helped you overcome your body image issues. They have been there through all of the best and worst parts of your life. They have constantly been there to cheer you on all the time reminding you how amazing and truly loved you are. Then suddenly they are gone leaving an empty spot in your heart. I know I have never felt more vulnerable and alone as I did those first couple days.

Ending a relationship may break your heart, but losing a friend can shatter your soul. When you lose a friend, there are no songs, movies or books to guide you. You look around and realize the shoulder you usually go to cry on is no longer there. Your entire world feels like it’s crashing down around you, but that doesn’t mean you won’t get through it. I know how it feels, I have been there, and I survived. I made it through to the other side.The reason I was able to move on is because I realized some things just aren’t meant to be. Not all people are meant to stay in your life forever as much as you may want them too. I accepted the fact that our friendship had run it’s course and even though it hurt I was able to move on. Although we aren’t friends anymore I will always remember the good times we had together, and all the lessons she taught me. I grieved what I had and then I made new friends and so will you. It may take some time but you will get there, I promise.

Originally Published on Her Track

A Princess On Her Track

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I am excited to share some amazing news with all of you. One of my favorite bloggers Lexi Herrick just launched a new site called Her Track. It’s a collaborative site featuring some truly great writers and I am excited to say I am now one of them!

The site has articles to you ladies with anything life may throw at you. Decorating tips. work and internship advice, heartfelt stories, and a few little tips that may change a girls life. Go look at the site yourself I am sure you will find something you can relate too.

I am so incredibly grateful to be a part of this team, and I cannot wait to see where this track takes me. 🙂

 

Leave Your ‘Denialship’ and Make It Official

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When two people are in a denialship, they talk on the phone every day, text each other constantly, they go out but “it’s not a date.” They hook up regularly, and even though they have the option they never hookup with other people. They obviously care about each other but they won’t admit it. If this describes the situation you are in I want you to CUT. THE. CRAP.

You are basically in a relationship without the title. Let me guess when people bring this fact up to you, you probably respond with something like, “I just don’t want a relationship”, right? Honestly all of you are just making up excuses and selling yourself short. If you really like this person and they really like you then why shouldn’t you be together? Some people spend all of their time looking for relationships. But in truth you don’t find relationships, they find you whether or not it YOU think it’s a convenient time. So you can call it fate, coincidence, but if you found someone you have chemistry with you shouldn’t ignore it.

So I want you to get up, go out and go find whoever this person is and make your relationship official. I know a lot of people think that college is just for random hook ups and drunken adventures. But you know what you can still have drunken adventures together, and random hookups aren’t always as fun as they sound. So start thinking of the pros instead of the cons. Now you’ll always have someone to go out with, and you won’t have to worry about finding a date to another event.

So go out on real dates. Hold hands on campus as you walk to class. Snuggle with them at the movies. Go ahead and make it Facebook official, or maybe tweet about it. Take pictures and post them with those cheesy couple hashtags, we won’t judge you (ok maybe a little). Just stop being in a denialship and start being in a relationship. Don’t let this whole, one night stand random hook up college mentality stop you, because despite popular belief entering a relationship isn’t the ending, it’s only the beginning.